Have any of you recently emptied out a home you’ve lived in, raised your kids in, for almost 29 years? If not, I do not recommend. Holy crap.

I can honestly say that this process – emptying out and selling our home – has been one of the most stressful periods in all of my 59 years. The amount of stuff a family of 5 accumulates over the span of 29 years is unbelievable.

For years, in the weeks before Christmas, I would venture into the basement and very quietly donate some of the kids’ toys, knowing they would be getting more soon. As they got older and their gifts shifted to more non-toy items, I guess I just stopped donating. Big mistake. We were left with a ton of stuff to donate and throw out. A few items were kept by the each kid to save for their future kids or simply out of a feeling of nostalgia.

There was some laughter, at my expense of course, while cleaning out the cedar closet and marveling not only at the amount of clothing I had stored in there, but at what those items actually looked like. Hey, I thought I was pretty fashionable years ago and some of those things are popular again, so there!

We were all sad – some more than others – at the thought of not living there anymore. Some days, while leading up to listing the house, I would just walk around the house crying, thinking of all of the memories we made there. I didn’t expect that. I had always thought of it as just a house and that our home would be wherever we all were. I had wanted to sell it and downsize in a few years anyway…we just sped up the timeline, so why was I so affected by it?

To my surprise, the stupidest thing really set me off. The command strips. Weird, right? I had command hooks in certain areas that we used to hang up our Christmas decorations every year. We all knew what went on each command hook. Every year. Removing those shook me for some reason. Christmas was magical in that house for many years – especially when the kids were little. Somehow, popping off those hooks and removing those strips just put me over the edge. That simple act – well not so simple for a few of them – somehow made the whole thing real for me. I was not ok.

Selling a house is no joke. It is stressful. There are a lot of feelings involved. A lot of emotions. But now it is done and so we move on. We are renting for a bit until we decide where we want to be so no new command strips yet, but there will be sometime soon…..

Home is not a house. It is where your family is. Where you all gather to laugh, to celebrate to love.

I know, in my head, this is true. My heart just needs to catch up a little…